…:::CORTINA WHIPLASH PRESENTS::::…
THE RANDOM MUSINGS OF A LEBANESE HALFBREED
Edition 1.000
I like to exude a calm, unassuming exterior, I always have but as with most calm, unassuming seeming people there is an eccentric crack-head lurking just below the surface, an alter ego if you will, a persona that needs to find release and this my dear reader is it’s platform.
For instance, whilst writing this introductory edition I was sidetracked by the thought of boobs which led to the Googling of “ascii boobs” which led to this:
Perfect Breasts (o)(o) Fake Silicone Breasts ( + )( + )
High Nipple Breasts (*)(*) Big Nipple Breasts (@)(@)
A Cups oo D Cups { O }{ O }
Wonder Bra Breasts (oYo) Cold Breasts ( ^ )( ^ )
Lopsided Breasts (o)(O) Pierced Breasts (Q)(Q)
Hanging Tassels Breasts (p)(p)
Flat-Against-The-Shower-Door Breasts ( - )( - )
Android Breasts |o||o| Porn Star Breasts ($)($)
Which in turn led to the realization that there are some extremely creative yet bored people in the world for which I have much respect and gratitude and I suppose in writing this circular I hope to become one of them. In a world where everything is contrived, over-produced or has already been done before what do we really have to offer but a little bit of realism and honesty and the reality is that I’m no-one special, neither are you, neither is Oprah, nor Zuma. Sure so some us drive nice cars, some of us will have to live through genocide, the ultimate truth remains... none of us know why we’re here. We’re like organic chickens living gleeful, free-roaming lives unaware of the inevitable demise that awaits us. Except that we do know what awaits us, therefore I can only surmise that denial must be the key to our survival. Think about it, if we truly acknowledged how short life is would we really have time for things like Hanna Montana or Brangelina or square watermelons, or Christian rock music? Lord knows I’ve tried to rationalize such things but in a world without reason denial is your only friend.
So in the spirit of denial we deny that our music is in any way familiar with the homosexual conduct or drug use of George Michael. We further deny that Marilyn Manson makes poignant observations about society in his music. Further still, we deny that Joost nicknamed his own penis the “NicNac”. So let us embrace all those who deny that they deny and especially those that will be denied entrance into heaven। Amen।
Until next time, Peace in the Middle East.
The Lebanese Assassin.
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