3/10/11

“All the money in the world and you’re still a douche… a work in progress”:

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

I know my reasons but what’s your excuse

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

Just learn to love your bad teeth and big tush

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

White S.L.K and a scrunchie to boot

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

That’s why I’m going to the voting booth


I’ll never know why some suffer and some don’t

Why the rich get richer and the poor get broke

All I know is that I’m happy with what I’ve got

And money will never buy the things that I’m not


Why are you defined by these material things?

Sense of self attached to the amount that you bling

If you eat lots of chillies your anus will sting

We’re all the same if you look under our skin


KICK IT!


All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

I know my reasons but what’s your excuse

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

Just learn to love your bad teeth and big tush

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

White S.L.K and a scrunchie to boot

All the money in the world and you’re still a douche

Wah wah wah waaaaaah


Yeah so it’s a little rough around the edges –hey! - you try finding words that rhyme with “douche”. But that’s how Cortina Whiplash rolls, never daunted by a seemingly futile undertaking, we always persevere!


All douching aside though, things in the Cortina Whiplash camp are crazier than ever, brinjals, noughts, bruises, mosh pits, you name it - it’s happening. I think finally people are starting to hear what we’re saying which is: “Let go of your inhibitions! Liberate your body and mind, make an ass of yourself and enjoy it! And most of all don’t be afraid because Cortina Whiplash will be there to lead by example.

And to those of you who never had any inhibitions to start with (Joburgers), we salute you!


Until next time.

-Tessa Lily


*Pic by David Butler